XXXVIII. Ready & Willing -

How do you measure enthusiasm?

Exclamation marks are slowly being phased out save for “English-as-a-second language” books that aim to provide the soon to be Anglicized readers with an understanding of how to express one’s self  - your voice rises an octave at the end of a question and so forth.

Exclamation marks are not looked upon favorably- they are understood to be an obnoxious and juvenile hieroglyphic.

I just applied to a summer internship. How would they understand my enthusiasm for this position? Right - my availability: subtle but telling, no?

All days of the week; Full-time (*8 hours or more/ day), May - August 2012.

“All days of the week?” This sounds a little too eager.

Monday-Friday; Full-time (*8 hours or more/ day), May - August 2012.

My confirmation e-mail of their office having received my anthropomorphized e-mail, stated that I would only receive further, non-computerized contact, if chosen for an interview that apparently was highly unlikely seeing as how the volume of applicants was excessive.

Earlier this year, I had applied to post-graduation programs that would help propel me into medical school. These programs are prestigious and competitive to gain admittance to because they are so successful in getting their students admitted into medical school. However, these programs are not a necessary step for getting into medical school - there are other ways.

Again I had to express my enthusiasm. To practice medicine is a passion I have possessed since my first memory of being in a clinical setting - I was getting vaccinated.

My personal statement was starting to read as though someone had administered an injection into my brain matter where thoughts are housed, and extracted the contents onto the paper that I had printed with cerebrospinal fluid for ink, and now held in my hands.

What if the admissions officers took this level of intimacy and passion as a sign that someone needs the seat in their program more than myself?

That is to say, what if they say:

This girl is so motivated and wants to be a physician so much that she will no doubt find a way to be a doctor and gain a seat in medical school. She doesn’t need this program to get where she wants to be. From the sound of her personal statement, it seems that she will not let anything hinder her from becoming the surgeon she wants to be.

No-

I may be strong and stubborn - resistant to anyone who dares to deny me a future in which I am something other than a physician, a surgeon - but I need this.

I am ready and willing to disrupt my peace of mind and my life-plan.

I am ready and willing to relinquish my fervor and need to attack when confronted - confronted with questions tainted with skepticism, concerning my oddball path to that white room adorned with two diplomas and a bowl of mithai in place of the lollipop/chocolate concoction that all the other American physicians keep as an offering to their patients.

I hereby offer my prayers -